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"I have known music to be her timeless reverberation in a forlorn corner of my soul; just when life was closing down upon me with its pangs of haunting silence."
"Hope is the point the 'world within' comes to an equilibrium with the 'world around'."
"The cold that my body feels can be comforted by pullovers of our choices. It is the winter that comes back each year, inevitably; is how we are connected on the face of time. A sweet suffering of forever..."
"My poverty, I know, was glamorous because trading you, my love, for a better life is outright heinous."
"Love was the day when she drank and I felt quenched."
"Life, ever since, had been one gripping tale. Your happening gave it a genre."
"Want is the soul's desire. Need, the mind's crave. Love, thus, I believe, is a bit of both."
"Art is how you lie to the world without ever feeling sinned."
"Sorrow is true and beyond the powers of healing, when you can taste the oceans on your lips."

SNOW BURIED PROMISES. A tribute to the martyrs of Siachen Avalanche

SNOW BURIED PROMISES. A tribute to the martyrs of Siachen Avalanche
~ Sobhan Pramanik | Friday, February 12, 2016 |
More than anything else, the promise was to come back.
But up there, the mountains had different plans. They moved, as the unforgivable snow came sweeping down the terrain in threatening waves, shrouding the brave lives with a cold jacket of death. However, they stayed just like that – meeting death in its eye below the frozen earth; crushed by the snow; blood slowly ceasing in their limbs, as life kept company of their mangled bodies, no better than that last leaf on a withered tree in storm. It was waiting, fighting and trying to live, even when death had long owned them. And I am sure it was nothing, absolutely nothing but their lonely will to survive, the power of the prayers their loved one’s muttered in devotion through every single day of their being away on the frozen mountains, purchasing peace with life and those promises above all, that kept dragging their gritty heart to its next possible thump.

The name itself rose terror – Siachen Glacier. 20,000 feet above earth, lost in snow, right up at the Line of Control between Indian and Pakistan, along the eastern Karakoram Range of the great Himalayas. A place where life is not programmed to survive and hence, any existence there in a temperature of -60, with the hopeless sky almost falling upon the icy blue mountains, came at the very mercy of death.

No sooner than the news of an Avalanche rocking Siachen was sent out, rescue teams, provided with every life supporting amenities were flown in to the land of devastation – deployed with the seemingly impossible task of recovering those trapped, fighting souls from under the enormous covering of concrete snow. As electronic saws and drills rattled the glacier, the Jawans united by the mad compassion of rescuing their fellow mates, it was only the frozen, lifelessness that, one after another, started to reach up their searching hands in the sea of cold.

Death had almost won and the promises all looked untrue; till on the sixth day, thirty feet in snow, life was found feebly pulsating in frozen veins. Military aircraft had then flown through blinding mist and that miracle survivor, Lance Naik Hanaman Thappa, was airlifted to RR Hospital in Delhi. What looked a futile search, a failed rescue operation till then, cutting through acres of ice round the clock atop one of the highest place in the world and finding brave heart Thappa down there, had suddenly brought the nation together in a sudden burst of joy. Not only was his extraction from 30 feet beneath the snow a magical, unbelievable effort by the rescue team, but also his being alive and the hopes for his survival, were just starting to be the much needed aid to the deep sadness of the death of all the other soldiers.

But at last death won. The iron soul succumbed. And sadness, like a pregnant wave, came rushing all the way from the mountains and closed upon the country in tears and shattered hopes. The blood, perhaps, had long became ice in his veins, but Naik’s heart continued to walk that extra mile. The bones sure had contracted to the point of crumbling, but the skin never fell off. And what really makes this possible, what really adds those extra hours to your existence when death had owned you, is nothing but the power love.
....If only love could breathe life back to the promises that all broke and died upon the mountains in snow. All the promise to be back home. To the familiar air of his village. To the moments of sitting together at meals with your loved ones. And to the playful trotting horse he became every time, Netra, his 2 year old daughter, propped up on his back.

© Sobhan Pramanik
‪#‎BraveHearts‬
‪#‎SiachenAvalanche‬
‪#‎RIP‬

PROHIBITED

PROHIBITED
~ Sobhan Pramanik | Thursday, January 07, 2016 |

Like wildlife reserves, even relations come with their own well demarcated, accessible and prohibited zones. There are these spaces where everyone is allowed. Every single soul, in their free, undisturbed roam can go wandering without any inhibition or even bothering to measure the consequences of their doings. Such spaces naturally come with an uncalled safety. There's really no one to probe you with the protectiveness of it all. Simply being ...there, letting yourself uncoil along the tide of your independent thoughts, you cannot help but feel immensely secured. And on the other hand there are these prohibited zones marked with red on your map, where we don't even desire to be present in person to feel the vulnerability. The very demarcation, the fact of being unguarded and above all, the fear in our heart, pursues our mind with an alacrity that manages to keep us away from such zones and their privacies forever intact.

I regret that I loved you from the accessible space in me. However, it really saddens me to absorb the idea of letting you into that region, coming right up close to my feelings. And just when I had my love plucked out of my heart, blossoming and fragrant and have kept it on your palm, hoping you would cherish it forever, the same way I did it for you, you closed your fingers and crushed those
breathing petals. Killing me altogether.


But then, I also loved you enough to keep aside a prohibited zone for myself, where no one dared to venture. Not you. Not anyone. Up there in my protected solitude, where the most dangerous animals are believed to reside, my feelings wander free - untouched and true at its heart. And sometimes, when the fact of being killed by you on the outer spaces of my world becomes a regret, it is those very feelings in my heart that becomes those wild, feared animals that keeps the world at bay and you, tightly held against my chest.

WILL

WILL
~ Sobhan Pramanik | Wednesday, January 06, 2016 |

It was getting tougher for him with each passing day. Not being able to put his feelings into words was a crushing feeling that drove him crazy. With every breath, all he ever wanted was to let her know how much he loved her.  And so, finally, that day, he summoned all his courage and decided to call her up and confess his love.
Just when he was about to call her, his phone lit up on his palm and with her name across the screen, it felt like even the heavens was easing up the task for him. Or so he thought.

He always found himself lost before her. And even today, with all the summoned courage ready in his throat, he couldn't hold himself falling into the dreamy drift her voice lent to his life. As if he was a verse and she was the tune. They started talking and the conversation soon took a different lane altogether. And as always, his courage, the emotional audacity, betrayed him just at the right moment.

"You are an amazing friend dear." She had said, still laughing over a silly joke he had just cracked.

"Your laughter is the prettiest I have ever seen." He replied closing his breath around a cry that was already erupting in his heart.

"Haha. But how can you say so? You haven't even met me."

He had then picked up a shard of glass that lay at his feet on the grass. Having tapped the dust away, it at once caught the sparkling ring of the moon in the sky and its brilliant dazzle, almost had him blink. 'It must be just like this.' He wondered looking at her smile that he held on his palm.

"Where there is a will, there is a way." He replied instead, tightening his fingers, as the moon on his palm tore through his skin and cold blood dripped onto the grass.

ARCHAELOGIST

ARCHAELOGIST
~ Sobhan Pramanik | Wednesday, January 06, 2016 |
I love her like the blue lake, might love the migratory birds on its banks. Scattered in an array of colors; diving into the waves, swooping out of the trees and singing to the delight of the visitors. At once gathering, accolades from the world.


It is her moving away from me, her circumstantial absence, that feels like the winter. The grass, then, pales out on my banks. The mist rises over the horizon. The sky sheds its indigo jacket. The pines weep under the snow. My waters, whose once rippling waves enfolded the music of her voice, starts to freeze. And soon I am forgotten under the covering of snow. My presence as unknown to the world, as fossil, an artefact embedded in the heart of the earth.

It is my fate that holds me from succumbing. And so I wait.
I wait for her to return from across the mountains, and rediscover my love like a much awaited truth. Break the ice of suffering and breathe life back to my world. For it is only that, the touch of love, that can both freeze one into captivation and also set it free. And for that, for being able to continue swinging between the thrill of living and dying in love, I let myself be an uncovered fossil and she, my lovely archaeologist.

VAGABOND

VAGABOND
~ Sobhan Pramanik | Wednesday, January 06, 2016 | |
My verses were a population of vagabonds,
Moving along the painful distance ...
Separating my heart from yours.
The heartbreak that you sometimes tore me with,
Were the sudden raids in the middle of the night;
Driving them away to clear the land.
Those tongue splitting words
That you hurled in rage
Were vehicles leading the raids--
Smashing through their huts,
Sweeping clean their existence,
Grinding honesty to dust.
Still,
The vagabonds that they are,
Kept moving from one smashed
Land to another--
Dreaming of a new shelter,
Hoping of one permanent home
Where they could knit
Their dreams and tomorrows into one
Without being chased away.
And it was only when you
Held ajar the doors of your heart;
That my verses,
Those vagabonds,
Had their lonely wandering
Finally find a peaceful night's slumber.

© Sobhan Pramanik
January 2016
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